Would Those be Steak, Shoestring or Calf Fries?

I can’t believe that the time is nearly at hand. Everything is set and the last few remaining wrinkles are being ironed out. The Turd is in great shape, the Jeep is working fine and there have been no additional problems as of yet to report. We are looking at a mid-week departure and the kid’s couldn’t be more excited. As the big day nears, we have been working to develop basic itineraries for each day of our journey. Nothing set in stone, just ideas and information about points of interest in the event we have more down time in a location than we expect. At a recent gathering, some friends told us that they once lived in an area we will be passing through, and made some recommendations as to what we should do while we are in town. One of the options they recommended is a large cowboy steakhouse that is apparently the home of the original “Texas Gut Buster” steak dinner. The deal is that if you eat a 72 ounce steak, shrimp cocktail, baked potato and salad within the allotted time frame, in this case one hour, you don’t have to pay for the meal. Apparently they even have a live feed (no pun intended) on their website, so you can watch the gluttony live online. Perusing the menu I noticed a number of interesting items such as fried rattlesnake and mountain oysters, which apparently are quite a regional delicacy. Here is a little advice…if you ever find yourself in a place that offers mountain oysters and have a hankering for seafood…go with the shrimp. Don’t let the name fool you. For the uninformed, mountain oysters are not some sort of fresh water mollusk. They are in fact, the byproduct of a process that turns a bull into a steer. Are you with me? Think castration…now you have the picture. Apparently cowboys used to throw them on the open fire, waited until they popped and then ate them with a plate of beans. In some neck of the woods they are referred to as calf fries, so savvy traveler beware! My wife said that she thinks that I am the perfect candidate for the 72 ounce steak challenge. I told her that the only way I would consider it is if she ate the mountain oysters first. Of course she is way too smart to fall for this ploy. Understandably she sternly refused to even consider the mountain oysters upon discovering their true origin. So the challenge is off for now and it looks like I will be having the Prime Rib and my wife will probably have a chicken sandwich with a side of fries….perhaps I will recommend the calf fries?

Stay tuned.